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What is Everyone So Angry About? A discussion about Anger |
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Written by Leslie Karsner
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An elderly woman in front of you is driving 25 miles per hour as you rush to work. How do you react? Your child spills his drink all over your newly cleaned floor. How do you react? These and many other every day situtations are enough to get some people very angry. Yet others would be unfazed or react calmly. What is the difference between these two types of people and how can the angry reactor modify his behavior? Anger is a secondary emotion that commonly masks other more vulnerable emotions. Feelings like hurt, jealousy, guilt and sadness for some are more easily expressed through anger. Even if the emotion is unstated, it is often easier to feel angry at someone than acknowledge that they hurt your feelings. The problem with anger is that it often gets out of control. If expressed too aggresively it can hurt others and damage relationships. If unexpressed and held in, it can manifest itself physcially through headaches or other somatic symptoms. Also unexpressed anger seems to feed itself and grow and at times may
begin to feel like an obsession. So what should we do with our anger? Anger is a normal reaction to many events. It should be validated and recognized but in order to express it in a healthy way, it should be examined. Here are some questions to ask yourself when thinking about your anger. Is my feeling of anger proportionate to its trigger? In other words, do you get just as angry when your kids spill a drink as you do when they talk back to you? If so, you might think about what else is feeding your anger. What do you do when you are angry? Do you throw things, fume silently or attack others? Have relationships been effected by your anger? If there are negative consequences after an an anger filled event it might be worth examining the origins of your anger. What triggers my anger? Is it the little things that push you over the edge? I s there a feeling that triggers anger? For example, do you lash out when you begin to feel vulnerable or guilty. Understanding one’s tirggers is the first step in modifying behavior. How do I feel when I start to get angry? It is easier to calm down when feeling a little angry. If you can begin to notice how your body feels as you begin to get angry, you can use other techniques to calm yourself down before the anger accelerates. What works to calm me down? Pay attention to ways that have worked in the past. Some examples are listening to music, taking a walk or using humor. Anger is a common and complicated emotion. If your anger is negatively impacting important relationships in your life or you are using alcohol or drugs to calm yourself, seek professional help in examining the sources of your anger.
It’s a beautiful hot summer day, yet some people just can’t get out of bed. Depression is more than just a one day case of the blues. How can you distinguish depression from grief or a bad day and what do you do if you determine that you or someone you love is depressed? Depression vs. Grief Suffering any type of loss, be it a death, break up or even a move from one location to another is bound to bring up feelings of sadness. There may even be crying spells, loss of appetite and an inability to concentrate. While these symptoms can also signal major depression, the intensity and duration distinguish them from a depressive episode. A grief reaction may last several months to a year but one will notice that symptoms diminish with time. With major depression, symptoms stay the same or worsen and there is also a preoccupation with worthlessness, as well as suicidal ideation. There may be physical agitation and a loss or gain of weight. Those who are depressed feel that life is no longer worth living and find no joy in any activity. What to Do? True clinical depression requires treatment. Up to 15% of individuals with severe major Depressive Disorder die by Suicide (DSM IV). If you or someone you know feels depressed, the first step is to see your physician who can prescribe an anti-depressant or refer you to a psychiatrist. In addition, it has been shown that the combination of medication and psycho therapy can improve depressive symptoms in the long term. Depending on the issues, therapy can address family and personal concerns as well as provide ways to modify one’s thought process to lessen the potential for future episodes. What else helps? If you are the person who is depressed, it is important to take care of yourself physically. Sleep patterns are often altered so getting enough rest might not be a problem. Rather, it is important to get out of bed regularly and get some exercise. Even a simple walk outside will be helpful in lifting mood. Eating balanced meals is often a challenge since loss of appetite is a symtom yet dehydration and lack of nutrition can worsen depressive symptoms
Darlene is in residency at the CTS Counseling Center and is a life coach. She specializes in personal professional growth and development as well as lifestyle change. Please feel free to contact her for a complimentary coaching session and for information about the services she offers. Call Darlene today to experience the growth you've been seeking!!
I have been working with people in the context of their families, culture and social economic status for over 17 years. To do this I provide individual and family counseling, marital therapy and pre-marital counseling as well as divorce recovery in a safe, supportive enviroment. Common concerns you may experience include: depression, anxiety, difficulty sleeping (emotional issues), trouble adjusting to transitions such as aging, children as they reach adolescence, changes in relationships or work. If you are experiencing any of these issues, professional intervention is usually helpful. I have a great deal of experience with child development and parenting issues as well.
More info... (http://us.rd.yahoo.com/dailynews/rss/search/families/SIG=12mmo1vjt/*http%3A//newsok.com/families-troops-mourn-4-scouts-killed-in-tornado/article/3256613)OMAHA, Neb. (AP) -- First came the shock, then the grief. As dozens of people injured in a tornado at an Iowa Boy Scout camp recovered, families and friends tried to make sense of the deaths of four teenage Scouts who had gone to the elite camp to learn how to be leaders. At a vigil held in an Omaha park Thursday night, people wiped tears from their eyes as Scout leaders weaved through the ...
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